Reflection Paper on Personal Conflict

I have a close friend whose name is Chin. Chin has issues with his family, it causes him to be pessimistic and have low self-esteem. As a friend I be kind to him by being a good listener and offer him advices, but he starts becoming clingy. Once, Chin asked me to meet him immediately at a nearby restaurant. I rushed there because I was worried of him being suicidal. I knew I should not but I started to feel annoyed because he is depressed for the same old reason.

I felt he was seeking for attention by making a great deal out of nothing. Few months ago, with few friends we went for a vacation in Bangkok. We were enjoying but Chin was gloomy and made the situation awkward for us. I was so frustrated and when Chin was not around, I blurted out something that he told me not to tell anyone. The worst part was, later, a friend brought up the issue in front of Chin!

Chin knew it was me who told them because I was the only one who knew.

Chin said that he felt betrayed as I was the only one he could count on. I asked for his forgiveness and explained that I knew I was wrong but I was being let down by his gloomy behavior when the rest of us just wanted to have fun and it was painful for us to watch him squandering in self-pity.

At first Chin was being silent but I said I would appreciate if he could forgive me. I also promised that I would do my best to make it up to him because the last thing I want is to lose our friendship. Finally he said that he did not want to lose our friendship either. After making him promise to deal with problems positively in future, we reconciled and now we are again talking on the phone every day. This painful experience has taught me to think carefully before I speak something because it might hurt people who are important to me. In addition, it has influenced me to put myself in the other person’s shoes because I would be hurt if someone does the same to me. If this situation happens again, I have learned not to be afraid to be the one who takes initiative to apologize because I would rather lose a fight than a friend.